Published Work

MORE FUNNY STUFF

• It’s Time for a Netflix Inspired Dating App – Yahoo! Life

• The Last Dating App on Earth – Slackjaw

• A Creative Brief For Composing A DM To My Crush – Finalist in the 2021 Slackjaw Humor Writing Challenge

• Single Men Pitch Themselves to Me on Shark Tank – Finalist in the 2019 Slackjaw Humor Writing Challenge

• An Influencer Unboxes the Super-Cute COVID-19 Vaccine – The Bold Italic

• My Dating Apps, Wrapped

• Q&A with a LinkedIn Influencer – Slackjaw

• You’re Invited to My Tinder Reveal Party

• Yelp Reviews from My At-Home Bar

• A Few Words from an Airplane Middle Seat

• Please Help My Bras Find Work

• TurboTax for Singles

• 30 Popular Taglines Updated for a Virus Outbreak

• Men’s Dating App One-Liners, Loosely Translated

• Prepared Remarks for Singles at Thanksgiving – Featured in Medium’s Human Parts

• My Self-Partnership Registry – Slackjaw

• Items Still on the Shelf at the Forever 21 Bankruptcy Sale

• Digital Halloween Costumes – Featured in Medium’s GEN Mag

• Introducing: Sheet Mascs for Men – Humungus

• Married People’s Instagram Captions vs. Mine – Featured in Medium’s Human Parts

• My Millennial Funeral ☠️ – Featured in Medium’s Human Parts

• Alternatives to Hot Girl Summer – co-written on The Belladonna Comedy

• Welcome to Millennial Airlines – Featured on Medium’s Human Parts

• Beyonce’s Imagined Presidential Platforms – Weekly Humorist

• Subscribe to SpinsterSwag® – Slackjaw

• My First Reading (from my teenage LiveJournal) @ the Salon of Shame

• Jeff Bezos’s First Few Days as a Bachelor, as Described by Alexa Commands

• Why Be a Victoria's Secret Angel When You Can Be a T.J. Maxx Cherub? – Featured on Medium’s Humor Page

Personal Essays, ETC. #letsgetdeep

• All the Write Angles 2020 – Curious

• A Tough Call – Featured in Medium’s Human Parts

• All the Write Angles 2019

• The 48-Hour Second Date – Featured in Medium’s Human Parts

• A Love Letter to Seattle, a Mere Four Months in

• On Letting (Yourself) Go – A “Goodbye to All That” Essay on Leaving NYC

• Seriously?

• Everything is Copy.

• NY IS NOT YOUR BF.

• It is Raining This Morning in New York

• On Taking Risks: A 48-hour First Date

• Lately

• Small Victories

• Home is Where the Horse Shit Is

• Happy Endings

• Seasoning

• Sundance: Year Two (We're Still Irrelevant)

• Pushing & Pulling

• On Turning 30

• Honestly.

• 8 Years in NYC

• My Job is the Best Job

• A Seasonal Disorder of Sorts

• Sundance: A Timeline & Tale of Pure Luck, Inspiration & Expensive Elk

• Word Vomit

• Hometown Diaries

• A Post About Nothing, Really.

• Boys. BFFs. Booze. Books. Brooklyn. Other B Words.

• Advice for NYC Apartment Hunting

• You are Never Alone in New York

• Wine Babies, Cheap Thrills, Etc.

• Why You Should Probably Cohabitate

• An Update of Sorts

• Seven Years in New York City (or Why I'll Live Here Forever)

• How To Land Your Dream Job in a Million Easy Steps

• Lots of Firsts + Hopefully Lots of Lasts

• A Month of Sundays

• How To Travel To Paris Alone

• Not So Lost

• Under the Influence of Paris

• You've Had 10 Years to Make a Decision

• Cab Therapy

• The Edge of Rebellion

• Don't Ask Me About My Break-Up

• A Letter to My 22-year-old Self

• 9/11: Before, When + After

• It's Kind of a Long Story

• Five Years in New York

• Almost-Full Circles

• Why I'll Be Single Indefinitely

• Central Park Afternoons

Fiction:

• ALL THE MEN IN PARIS: Chapter 1, Chapter 2, Chapter 3, Chapter 4, Chapter 5, Chapter 6, Chapter 7, 8 & 9, Chapter 10

• Tequila Sunset

• The Writer Who Wasn't

• Sex + The City 5: Bright Lights, Old Bitches (A parody)

And more:

• Feature length comedy screenplay for Going Out available upon request.

• Spec script for Broad City available upon request.

• Spec script for Prospect Heights (half-hour comedy) available upon request.

 CASUALLY Mentioned around the web ON…

• Outside – Shania Twain Shares Hilarious Acronyms

• Quarantine Interview / Comic of the Day – comedy network live

• Politico – eHealth Tweet of the Day

• NBC News – Dating During Coronavirus

• Writer Websites That Rank Well: 8 Secrets of Top NYC Writers

• Favorite Writers on Medium

• The time Queen Beyonce herself posted my picture on her official Facebook page

• Cosmopolitan – 42 Halloween Pun Costumes That’ll Make Everyone Laugh Out Loud for Real (#5 AND #11)

• GoodHousekeeping – 25+ Pun Halloween Costumes That Are Too Good to Pass Up (#21)

• InStyle – Gwyneth Paltrow Is Standing Inside a Vagina and Everyone Has Questions

• HuffPost – Yes, ‘Will & Grace’ Went After Trump In Its First Episode In 11 Years

• 2017 interview with me on McSweeney’s Patron page

  
  Praise for "And God Created Millennial Earth" —>

  • "It's so good. Just the perfect thing." – Sam Sanders, NPR's It's Been a Minute 

  • "LOL." – Mayim Bialik

  • "Blasphemous and a total blast at the same time." – God, probs

  Read an interview with me about the piece.

  - Read an excerpt from “I Like My Men Like I Like My…” in Reader’s Digest

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